The October Music, Stanza 2 - Day 14

Edge of Paradise

            One small step. That’s all it’ll take. One small step and I will join my brothers and sisters in the realm beyond. I look to my left and right and see the nervousness, excitement, and apprehension of my friends as it mirrors my own on their faces. The Healer told us it would be this way, you know. He told us that one day we were to face a test of faith and that it would require overcoming fear. He said it would come soon.

Still, here I am, standing atop the Morris Financial Building and peering over the edge at the frantic congregation below. I see lights flashing ruby and sapphire, yells and pleas from onlookers. I see cameras broadcasting our faith to the world around us. I can only imagine what they are saying. Loons? Crazy? Brainwashed? Devout would be more accurate. Even the thoughts hurt, though. That we would be so mocked for expressing our belief in our Healer? He told us we would be persecuted. When I see the hurt on all our faces, it makes sense, but still.

            The bullhorn erupts in a flurry of measured desperation. She says she’s here to help. She just wants to talk. Would we please step back from the roof? We could get the help we need. We wouldn’t be arrested or placed in confinement. They just want us to be safe. She doesn’t understand that this is safety. This is The Healer ensuring that our souls remain pure and uncorrupted by the world around us. She doesn’t understand. She can’t.

            That’s no fault of hers, of course. She hasn’t been enlightened. She’s been stuck in her work-a-day world bringing the cruelty of humanity to heel. She has seen violence and ugliness I cannot even bear to imagine. I respect her for her dedication to saving the world by saving people. She just doesn’t understand that there is no saving people. People are brutish, mindless beasts eating and fighting and fornicating just to make it through a day. The Healer knows. The Healer has been there. He knows the only way out, the only way to Paradise, is through our actions.

            So, here we are. Seven of us. Standing, waiting for our signals. There used to be eight. Tarek got cold feet. He wanted to back out. Said he had been doing research on his own about The Healer. He told us lies upon lies about being swindled. About how we had been robbed and manipulated. He used words like sociopath and narcissist. I don’t know what those words mean, but they weren’t nice. He was up here with us and tried to get Alyssa to go back down the stairs with him. He always liked her, though she is The Healer’s favorite. Lucas helped Tarek over the edge to find his Paradise. I hope he did.

            The bell chimes midnight. Our signal. One by one, we jump into weightless oblivion. I go last.
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            I hope I believed enough.