The Best Things I've Ever Made
Robocopter Ski PatrolThe year is...some year. Let's say the present. Yellow cake uranium sits, waiting to be sold, in a foreign country. The leader hides himself away, fearing assassination - as he should, because that's how the country works. It's kind of a stupid country. And well he should worry, for skulking his way around Europe is an ambitious Baron just looking for the right opportunity to seize the throne and all the powers and chances that come with it. If only his pets would stop exploding... Across the ocean, Adam Bitchenstein attempts to win over Miss Girl from Ipanema for the nth time. However, a phone call from out of the blue will change everything in their lives forever. It's always a phone call, right? Join Adam, Miss Girl from Ipanema, and a cast of idiots and perverts as they seek to stop the balance of world power from changing before it's too late. Also, there's a Robocopter. Not sure if you picked that up but...it's kind of important.
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Untitled Spy Story: A NovelSometimes you're in the right place at the right time. Sometimes someone ends up getting shot and you're on the run with your brother, the girl you want to sleep with, the girl your brother wants to sleep with, and the guy that slept with your girlfriend. Sometimes that ends up with a whole lot of mescal being consumed and hallucinating dance sequences. Sometimes that ends up with the Secretary of State wanting you dead. For Will Texas, sometime is now
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Ruben's Cube Alaska: Bullet Point 2: Judgment Day: This Time It's RealSometimes you just wake up and your entire life changes. You know, it's standard, really. Contacted by a shadowy government agency who thinks you're someone else. Hooking up with the local pastor's daughter and feeling guilty about it. Becoming roomies with a Russian who is possibly immortal. Getting swept up in international intrigue that threatens to end your life at any time and also you may be that person that people thought you were but you also may not be. It's complicated. Also, you or someone else that is also a hero and not you specifically find out that your entire life is part of some grander story over which you have no control and, in fact, are something more like a certainty, which doesn't really make sense even in context. Also, maybe you're the author and get tons of shade thrown your way by your own characters. That can happen too.
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